How to Look Like You

Yes, it was another informative, fun, and lively event with Jennifer Butler.  You've got to listen to some of the audio to get a sense of how she works. She is a wizardess and a priestess, helping women to know themselves better.  She gives them complete permission to play, and have fun with clothing.

Here are some photos from the event held at the Mill Valley Holiday Inn, last Saturday evening.  There had to be fifty people there to hear Jennifer, who never seems to tire.  She pours out love and acceptance, and yet, when she needs to, a shaking of the head, with a twinkle in her eye, seemingly to say, "It won't work...do you know why?"

 

Then to see people give away clothes they've had in their closet, and don't wear, is quite a generous event. To see people being willing to give up their coveted item on someone for whom it works for, is a complete joy.  The people who have their colors done are looking hot, and like themselves, the way you expect them to look.  Everything is lined up and congruent.  Your eye does not roam, looking to understand what is not working.

 

Wonderful evening Jennifer!   Thank you. 

We Walk a Similar Path

However different we make think we are, it is minuscule compared to what we have in common.  Marcia Branca and I have known each other since 1988.  For twenty years our relationship has winded down a path that hugs the earth, and comes upon vistas that one can see as far out as eye can see.  When she first became a client, we realized we had a couple of mutual friends.  Her personal interests seemed to be similar to mine, and to the friends we had in common.  And although our relationship has not brought us together socially, it's as reliable.  It's as if each time, we fumble for a few minutes to see where we left off, but then quickly get back into a rhythm of sharing that makes us laugh, cry and remember why we carry on for this many years.

Some of the ways we knew each other were from unrelated arenas, giving us the feeling that really this is too much.  We have seen each other grow, and shrink, and grow again.  We both have one daughter, we both write, we both have a similar spiritual practice, we both paint, we both love travel, we both want something better for our daughters.  We have both dreamt, and have had our dreams shattered.  We are survivors, and after a kind of life that we catch glimpses of, and mirror for each other.

The other day, she did her makeup and I colored her hair and took a photo.  Because the time before, I colored and cut her hair, we applied makeup, and she looked fabulous.  The camera had no card.  So, this is what we captured this time.  And this is what she had to say about our presidential campaign:  Click here to download.

There is a certain kind of beauty in knowing that certain people you are sure you've known before, and will always feel a connection to, no matter how much time goes by, and how little you do see each other.  Thank you Marcia for the years of friendship, loyalty, trust and laughter.  You are a beauty.

Hair Salon Personnel Change

Savanna, my anchor, and colleague is leaving the salon.  Her last day will be June 17, and it will be a sad day for me, although I am terribly excited for her.  She, and her husband Jeff, are heading to the UK, where he is from, and where she has spent time. Her father is English as well.  Savanna is a talented hairdresser, who is down-to-earth, unpretentious, and somebody you want to know forever.  Her hair designs are creative, detailed, and daring.  Her bobs are perfect, her one lengths impeccable, and her short haircuts are original and well suited for the hair texture and the facial features of her clients.  And, she is a beautiful, genuine, gentle, funny, and kind soul.

Then there is the way she dresses.  Vintage most of the time with a Savanna twist.  She will not wear makeup if she doesn't feel like it.  She is regal, yet funky.  She is grounded and steady.  She changes her hair more than any hairdresser I've known.

Her presence in the salon will be missed by a lot of people.  Her level of care for her clients from the moment they show up, until the time they walk out of the salon, is superior.  She takes care of their hair, describing it to them at length to them, informing them of things they have never known.  I have never heard the cuticle of the hair be so interesting before.

Savanna's future will be fascinating.  She plans to go to design school, with an industrial focus.  She was already a painter before she studied hairdressing at the Paul Mitchell school in San Francisco.  Savanna and Jeff dined at our place the other nite, and as usual, there was lots of laughter, good food, and stories.  In true Savanna style, she walked in with a wet painting to which she had just applied the finishing touches.  It was an oil portrait of me, with my latest haircut and color.  I think she captured a lightness of being, that I will treasure for all time.

Thank you Savanna for your artistry, professionalism, care for people, your beauty inside and out, and your dear friendship.  You are an inspiration to me, and words cannot define the deep level of respect I have for you.  And even though I shall miss you, I am proud of you for taking this leap.  I will see you in the UK.

Take Note Fashion World

Andrea, at Serrahna's, held another wonderfully colorful fashion event at Khana Peena on College Avenue, in Oakland today.  We had a great time.  The models were fabulous, all five of them...I lost count.  I was completely absorbed with each one of them, applying makeup and styling their hair.  The makeup application went a bit easier than last time, even though I was moving from the moment the first model showed, to when I left at about, 2:30 pm.  The real proof is what comes through in the photos. What I love about Andrea, is that her heart comes through in her clothing designs, she is able to articulate her passion through fabric, and design. Beautiful!  I also love the fact, once again, (I'm sorry if you've already heard it), that she celebrates, and honors every woman who steps into her business.  She helps them move in new directions and helps them become more feminine.  I love that the models are of all sizes and all ages.  How refreshing is that?  The fashion world takes notice!  You don't have to be 16, have skin and bones, and be flawless(yawn!), to be a woman.

I also loved how the models took on the divine feminine as they transformed before our very eyes.  Oohs and ahhs fell out of the mouths of the audience.  Queens!  It was such an honor to bring out what was already there, waiting to be drawn out.  They would walk back into the store, and say, "that was fun/"

Andrea and I walked over when the show was just about over, and with the grace of the Queen, she introduced me to each table of quests.  Thank you Andrea.

Upon my return home, my daughter had her own clothing situation to work out.  From showing me new shorts purchased with daddy to meltdowns around not having clean laundry to questioning the shoes I suggested for our bicycle ride to the park.  I loved every minute of being with her, up to patting her back and saying goodnight.  A nice balance to the day.  And now, a movie with my loved one.

I'll be sure to post the photos the minute I receive them.

Check out www.serrahna.com for Andrea's designs.

Sunset Hues in Her Hair

Cordelia was in today. Her hair was faded, but the black and the lightener pieces held up. I used 4.3 1/4 tube, and 6.46 on the base because I am was out of 5.46. I touched up the ends with special effects blood red, with hot lava, hi octane orange with a bit of yellow, and yellow by itself.  Cordelia is on her way to Greece for three weeks with her mother.  They are going on a sail boat for a contra dancing cruise.  She wanted to sport great hair, and so I went to work.  As, I swathed the sunny colors on her hair, we talked about our work, good food, and art.  We both had returned from women’s weekends, both wanting girl, art and nature, and good food connection. I came back with the deeper knowing that writing is what feeds my soul. Even so, sitting down and working on my book is the last thing I will sit and do. I’m afraid. What it requires for me to slow down enough to go deep inside feels like stepping into quicksand.

Back to Cordelia.  She continues to inspire me, to hold a torch for art and it’s importance to humanity. To end an insane day, with having time with Cordelia, was a dream.  There was lots of sparkle in the finished do.  I can picture her on that sailboat now, Hi Octane Orange colored hair blowing in the soft, warm wind.  People oohing and ahhing, “Look at that gorgeous woman, she must be an artist.”  Sunset hair!

Thank you Cordelia.

Ouch! That Brush Hurts

That was Dee's response was to my favorite round brush.  I never used to use them, in fact, when I trained with Rusk for a period of time, we had to do all our drying with a Denman or a vent brush.  The curvature was created by the haircut, but since working with them, I have slowly gone back to round brushing.  Those around me have brushes the circumference of a foam roller stuck in the hair of their clients, to form big 70's kind of hair.  I don't quite understand, but I don't get a lot of what the beauty industry supports. Back to Dee, ever since, it's been a running joke about this brush.  I've already written about her idea to photograph this brush in different environments.

We've struck up a friendship/professional relationship outside the salon.  She has a light hearted spirit, great sense of humor, and she is a fabulous photgrapher.  Wedding portrait images fill her portfolio. But check her out yourself.  Let me know what you think.  I think she has an incredible eye for design, lighting, etc.  www.deeconway.com.  Here are a couple for now.   We are talking about a shoot together soon.  Keep your eyes peeled.

That was Dee's response was to my favorite round brush.  And, I ddin't use to use them... When I trained with Rusk for a period of time, we had to do all our drying with a denman or a vent brush.  The curvature was created by the haircut, but since working with them, I have slowly gone back to round brushing.  Those around me have brushes the circumvernce of a foam roller stuck in the hair, to form big 70's kind of hair.  I don't quite understand, but I don't get alot of what the beauty industry supports.  But anyway, back to Dee, ever since. it's been a running joke about this brush.

We've even struck up a friendship/professional relationship outside the salon.  She's got a light hearted spirit, great sense of humor, and she is a fabulous photgrapher.  She exudes self-confidence-minus the ego.  Wedding portrait images fill her portfolio.  But check these images out yourself.  Let me know what you think.  I think she has an incredible eye for design, lighting, and a relationship to humans that is unique.  www.deeconway.com.  Here are a couple of photos for now. 

Thank you Dee!  I look forward to our shoot.

Romance Helper

Sierra Faith is a new acquaintance.  We met at Jennifer Butler's follow up event.  She came to me with long, lackluster hair, all one length.  She said she was ready to shed some of it.  I suggested bringing up the length, and layering.  At the last minute, I asked if she would mind if we cut and styled her hair, then applied makeup, and then took a before and after picture.  She said please do.  See what you think.

As we started talking during this, what I think she would call a transformative afternoon, she revealed that she was an online dating coach, hence her url of www.onlinedatingcoach.com.  She loves this work she is doing with men and women, about dealing with what is in the way of them not only meeting people, but walking the dating course with them.  They look at, and talk about what worked and what didn't.  She said, "Women don't know how to recieve from men."  I've been pondering that statement ever since.  This woman knows what she is talking about.

As I put the finishing touches to her hair, I could see tears trickling down her cheeks.   "This is who I knew myself to be."  This kind of transformation takes being ready inside. to let go of who we thought oiurselves to be.

Thank you Sierra.

Generosity Abounds

Beth has been a client since 1986.  Her loyalty to me as a person, a friend, a hairstylist, is unbelievable.  Twenty two years of unwavering support in all that I do.  Her heart is generous, always thinking about what I would like, not to mention she allows me to play with her hair.  I saw her the other day, and we discussed everything, while we applied a level 4, Majorel, on a zigzag section, from below temple, all the way around her head.  Then with many slices we alternated 6.01 20 volume, with the level 4, all on a level 5, with 90% grey.

Beth is a wonderful jewelry designer, artist, and has an interest in the world around her.  Listen to her talk about her ideas on creativity. 

Here is her bio:  Through my 30+ years working in the fields of Adoption, and other areas of Child Welfare including Foster Care with Refugee Youth,  I have found continual inspiration in the incredible struggles of people with broken connections and the magic of their healing.

Bellemirth Creations grew out of my interest in the mysteries of the creative forces within.  It has become my source of healing and revitalization of spirit and soul.

She uses Precious Metal Clay, which is a product comprised of silver particles mixed with an organic binder that is in a clay form. It is fired in a kiln, resulting in a piece that is actually .999% pure fine silver.  At high temperatures, the binder burns away and the metal particles fuse to form solid silver that can be sanded, soldered, and polished.

Thank you, Beth.  It is my pleasure to know you, and an honor to be with you, always.

The Tree of Life

Anne use to live in a live-work unit in the same building I did years ago.  I moved out, she moved out, and we hadn't seen each other until she popped intot he salon seven, or so, years later in a stylist's chair.  That stylist went out on maternity leave, and so Anne ended in up in my chair.  Then three years later, same thing.  Another pregnancy leave, and Anne was back in my chair. We had a great time.  Anne is smart, talented, and computer savvy, which I am not.  I shared my interest in interviewing clients, and she agreed in it's appeal.   I didn't know the extent of her creative genius, until we interviewed her, while she sat with color in foils all over her head. 

Beautiful Anne, I've got to get sound up and running so that we can hear you talking about this Tree of Life project.  Thanks for sharing with me.

Shoreline Park

Here are our images from the shoot.  We both learned some valuable lessons.  I can see my translation needs work, and the fact that the wind kicked up, really cut a lot of juice from the act.  Next time we both agreed that we need to work with less models, and really get the shot.

Serrahna's Spring Fashion Show at Marica's

My learning curve now feels like the long hike to Half Dome in Yosemite. I styled the hair and make-up for one of Serrahna's Spring Fashion Shows at Marica's restaurant. Her boutique is on College Avenue in Oakland, California. www.serrahna.com. She designs her collections using Indian Fabrics. I love working with Andrea. She is a beautiful, heartful woman, a talented designer, and she knows how to dress a woman. Walking into her store is like walking into a jewel-lined secret room. COLOR is all you see. 

In working with her fashion shows, this will be the third year; I'm trying to integrate what I've learned in my workshops by shortening my timing and setting up my kit to make sense to me on location. Plus, work on being creative and trying to project how things will look on camera.

The show took place at the restaurant next door to her boutique, seated about 50 people, and was packed. Her customers are her models; we had four of them, plus her lovely sister. We prepped the models at Serrahna's; then, they would walk over.

The working space was tiny, and I had to remove one of my lights to be able to plug in a curling iron. It took me an hour and a half for the model, Diane, the brunette with long hair. Beautiful texture to work with, and lots of it. Looking back, maybe next time, I would put half her hair up. I applied colors like Trax Bas and Sketch from MAC.

The second model was Emily, the lovely blonde. She also had lots of hair, but straight. Had I not taken so long for the first model, I would have curled Emily's hair. I put it up in a chignon and used colors like pewter to line her eyes, greens, and Orb from MAC.

The third model was Debra, a lovely woman with curly silver, gray, and white hair. We used plums, purples, and wines on her eyes and lips.

We also styled Andrea's sister; her shoulder-length, fine blonde hung straight. The braid was an excellent choice for dressing her hair up, without much product and manipulation.

Overall, I need to work on speed and color choices for make-up. Sadly, I was out of lashes.

Note to self: Work near the window, or create a light source. Bring a little bag for trash—more color selection for eyes, cheeks, and lips.

Overall, it was a good time. The models looked natural yet finished. And through their changes from cotton to silks, they worked their way around the restaurant. Complete pictures of loveliness sparkling in the night.

Andrea's next show will be on May 18th at Khana Peena on College Ave. in Oakland.  

Juarez Santiago McMiller

We pulled it off!  Everything went really well.  We arrived a t 12:00 pm, I was the first to arrive.  I set up in the living room at McMiller's place.  Then Zavia, one of the models showed, so we got started on her hair, sweet gal, eyes of a doe.  We rolled her hair into barrel curls, with a deep diagonal part, from temple to crown.  Then, our make up artist showed, Shabnam Hariri, fabulous artist, lovely disposition.  There was one other kind MUA, but she didn't have a care, and I can't recall her name, but was talented as well. Then, the five models showed.  The three sisters, Shilonda, Chantel, and Akila.  We had one other model show, and Mika, the owner of the clothing store came in carrying the clothing. 

And, of course Juarez.  He is a mix of fun, serious about his craft, strong ideas, and hip.  He knew what he was going for and he got it.  He definitly pulled together a great team of players.  Check out his work.  www.zrphotography.com. 

I pulled out hair pieces that I had practiced on, and laid out product, brushes, pins, grips, and hot tools.  Even though I had laid out plans of what I would do, I relaxed with it and allowed myself to create with what the models hair would do, could do, face structure, and hair texture.  I had a ball.  The models looked great, and although not professional...they put it on with the final touches of make up, hair, and clothing.

It was a mix of industrial, waterfront, backgrounds.  I was inspired by the water, movement, cultures mixing and swirling, and tried to capture it with the hairstyles.  I know we captured some beautiful, high fashion, beauty shots.

Around 8:00 pm, while the last bit of sunlight drained from the sky, and the freezing wind blew in from the bay, we took our last shot, hair blown barely withstanding the elements, models shivering bare-legged in spring cottons.  All of us, not too tired to laugh at the absurdity.  I called out,  "We must be mad!"

Online Magazine Launch

Yeah!  The Cutting Chair, has officially launched.  We have all been waiting with abated breath.  I know this online venture, as well as a coming out in print version, will do well.  They have high hopes of being a leading hair, fashion, and lifestyle magazine.  I think they can do it. This mulit-faceted site is in it's infancy, but already has come out with some strong visuals, fun content, and tips of the trade, for both clients and professional stylists.  I have written four articles for them.  Two are in this initial launch under articles.   How Green Does Your Salon Grow?  Things you can do to clean up your act.  The other, Interpreting the Runway:  Translating Trends into Wearable Hair.   We will see if others make it in at a later date.  Writing articles is new to me, but I found I enjoyed the research, and getting them in and out. Unlike the book, which is taking eons to bake, writing needs the time to mature.  It calls for a patience, particularly the book, that I didn't know I had.  Kind of like child rearing.

But back to the magazine.  Log on and see what you think.  Let them know what you would like to know more about.  http://www.thecuttingchair.com/.  Let's help make this ambitious project a great success.

The Luckiest Hairstylist Around

I met Rowan Gabrielle at the Jennifer Butler event in Mill Valley.  I thought to myself, this is a woman who walks to her own beat.  She isn't trying to be somebody she isn't, and yet, she was open to learning (a quality I happen to treasure).  She dressed in a unique way, (untrendy), with garments that exuded quality, the made-by-hand kind of quality.  She stood tall, lean, and quick.  Her energy was fluid, her eyes soft.    She wore her wavy hair long, to the middle of her back, the crown was heavy, and limp.  She wanted her hair cut into a shape that would keep her length in tact, and yet freshen it up.  She was open to my ideas.  We talked, as I cut, and I was blown away by her large scope of vision.  In fact, one of her projects which came to her in a dream, was to photograph people in their color, in the elements, on a vision quest.  Check out www.rowangabrielle.com for photos that will blow your mind.  I trimmed her ends, shaped it, and softened the front.  Layers at the crown of the head about seven inches, connecting to the length, down to the middle of her back.  With the weight released, her natural wave moved into "S" curves all around her head.  I cut a soft fringe around the front, opening up the right eye, connecting down into the longer lengths on the other side.  Lovely.

She had so much to say, and yet she exuded a quiet strength, a noticeable regal quality. She was somebody you want to know, and talk with, about everything.  She is a photographer, philanthropist, the head of a eco-leather business, called Organic Leather, founder of Urth.TV, and so much more.  She is from the UK, and has great ideas, but they don't stop there. 

 I've never met a woman, who does exactly what she has set out to do in the magnitude that she does, she travels the distance to see her projects through.  And still, she is full of graceful, solid, energy that is not weighted down by her journey, and she looks forward to the next adventure. 

After a completely satisfying, and compelling conversation, she gave me a copy of a book that her and her husband, Ayman Sawaf, self-published.   This book has me completely intrigued to read, it's called Sacred Commerce:  The Rise of the Global Citizen.  I'm anxious to give it to several people I know.  Check it out.  www.SacredCommerce.com

I have the best job around.  Thank you Rowan.  I'll look forward to the next time.

A New York Calling

I'm having the itch to move to New York.  I know it is a tough place to live i.e. weather, expensive housing, and noise.  Could I actually break into the hair world there?  This desire has nothing to do with practicality.  It's purely a feeling that perhaps I've outgrown this area, and standing behind the chair.  It would not only be a jump professionally, but the challenge could be quite stimulating.  I'm wanting to move into the editorial world, styling hair for fashion photography, and New York is where it's at in the field, or LA.  But LA is still west coast.  In order to go, I must really develop a great "book", and establish and nurture relationships there.  And I still want to freelance write as well. Can a family of three actually live comfortably there?  How much does one need to make to be comfortable there?  If I go, I want to live in the city, just for the experience, although I hear Brooklyn is great.  But I've always lived in the burbs, and if I'm going to go east, I've got to be in the city.  I want to study more with Giovanni Giuntoli.  He is a gifted hair artist, and a kind person, and I think can take my work to a whole other level.  I'm still integrating what I learned in his workshop three years ago.

Three years ago, in that class, I had the feeling that editorial was the direction I would head in.  And now, I am becoming more serious about it.  I told my partner a couple of days ago, don't worry, last month I wanted to move to Mexico, and this month it's New York.  Tomorrow may be Paris...well, as a matter of fact, Paris is one of the cities included in the master plan.

Could I just travel there instead of moving?   Perhaps.  I do plan to do hair for fashion week, once or twice a year.  I can see how it feels,  how viable,it is.  Does anybody have a relative there, or currently travels there regularly?  Are there any hairdressers reading this who know the industry there?  I'd appreciate any feedback.

Going feels like an expansion into fully realizing myself as a creative person.  It excites me to no end right now.  Creating beautiful hair, inspires me.  

Editorial Learning Curve

I'm working with hair pieces for this shoot coming up, now on six models, instead of the original five.  I just got the photos of the models dressed in some of the clothes.  Very trendy!  My goal is to execute hair that completes the picture.  I want the finished styles to compliment the total look, but I also want to challenge myself to be creative, and think high fashion.I'm looking forward to this shoot, to developing my skills of hairdressing for camera.

I just completed a shoot on Thursday.  The team-talented photographer Christian Pollock, stylist Krystle E. Hatchett, and her wonderful assistant, and I, are all in the process of developing strong "books".  We tested two models, one lovely female, and one Italian male.  It took me four hours to complete the models.  I felt less pressured about time, even though I know I must improve my time, and will, eventually.  More important to me right now though,  is the ability to execute the concept. 

Now, the stylists were more involved in assisting, and assuring I got the concept, which I was really grateful for.  I don't know if it is normal to have the open dialogue, but it felt necessary to know what the picture was in their head.   I was grateful for the feedback, and communication, I don't know how it could have happened any other way.  Krystle had a strong sense of what she was doing, and what she was going for, and her lovely assistant Kory was a dream.

We had fun, and I learned a great deal.  In case of low lighting, bring readers that are at least 200's.  Practice, practice, practice on as many , and as many looks as possible.  I experienced utter discomfort at times with my learning curve, humbling to say the least.  I need to develop my eye, to know what I am looking for, and how to achieve the end result...only through experience.   I certainly was unabashed to ask for advice.  It's just the way it is right now.  But also I felt self-assured in my abilities to communicate, and work with a team.  Christian was great to work with, easy going, and I like his work a lot, he's got a great eye, and definitely an upbeat manner about him.

I didn't stay for the shoot itself, as it was after 8:00 pm, and I needed to head back to the East Bay.  But the models looked great.  We created a 40's look, i.e. soft wavy hair, on her, with moist, clean makeup on her, and rough, gangster look on him.  I look forward to seeing the shots, and will be sure to post them.  And I want to work with Christian again.

Delfina Piretti

She is one of the most lovely, beautiful, talented people I know, and she is a client.  When she sits in my chair, I know I am in for a rich time.  She is an artist, and just returned from Xuahaca, Mexico, and other small towns, like Juchitan. She loved it, walking the streets, going to local markets, and seeing how the women dressed.  The land is barren, and yet the women wear the colors of a rainbow.  You won't see them wearing jeans and tennis shoes, but rather, embroidered dresses, ribbons and flowers in their hair.  And if they are feeling down, they will be sure to dress in the brightest colors.  And, as only traveling to another country can do, she was led inward to her own soul.  Delfina offered, ""Chronicles of travels through the Isthmus of Tehuantepec (which Juchitan is a part of) inevitably speak of fascination. Oddly enough, however, rather than express their wonder at the place, the architecture or the natural surroundings, chroniclers confess to having fallen irremediably under the seductive spell of the women." (La Tehuana /Artes de Mexico)

Juchitan is known for being a place where the woman are a cultural phenomenon in and of themselves, with their bodies, their clothing, their community rites and everyday activities, they create an environment, and rhythm of life that is unique to it. They are mythical in the most classical sense of the word, because their worldly existence and living rituals sustain and reproduce that myth. Thought these women are clearly Mestizas, the mythic voyage toward the Tehuana is a voyage to the roots,to the origins. An awed leap not only into the cultural wellspring constituted by the idea of Mexico, but to the buried mythic foundations of culture where matriarchy was apparently the rule. 

When i asked Na Marcelina about this she said it shouldn't be misunderstood that the women 'rule' the men. It's a place where the women are equal to the men, and mostly hold the position as the  primary  breadwinner.  When i asked Na Marcelina about this she said, 'It shouldn't be misunderstood that the women 'rule' the men. It's a place where the women are equal to the men, and mostly hold the position as the primary  breadwinner.'"

The land, the color, the people, the conversation, hearing another language, eating the food, all of it stimulating the mind, the psyche, and remembering what has happened before, and seeing, for brief moments, what the future holds.  Delfina is an artist, and is open to what life brings her, and is not afraid to go after what she wants.  By being open, she was led to an 78 year old Shamana, a wrinkled-faced woman with eyes full of life. She gave a healing, and repeated several times, ""you are the architect of your life".  She then fed her soup, and shared her own story, and gave her a healing.  The "session" lasted four hours and left Delfina changed.

Delfina added, "I needed to hear this for my own healing.  In shamanic tradition they teach that we co-create the universe.  For women it is important to feel empowered to realize our dreams against all odds. This is my wish this for all people. In my work as an expressive arts therapist, I use many mediums to assist in healing and finding greater ease and clarity on the journey called life."

Changes can be hard, and painful, and not to be taken lightly.  Delfina is brilliant at being right where she is, and feeling.  By telling me her story, I feel changed and open, and was reminded, our soul takes us on a trip we can't always understand.  Somehow though, I believe we are led to what we need and ultimately desire.  Upon returning home, and feeling a bit blue, and getting a haircut, she said, "Maybe I will go get a flower and put it in my hair."

Thank you Delfina.

To see some of Delfina's art, check out :  www.delfinapiretti.com/painting.html

The Dark Side of the Beauty Industry

I read this today and thought to myself, bravo, another mother writes about how the beauty industry is perpetuating in our young girls, the desire for it's products.  It frightens me! Referring to the 6-to 9-year old, as the "starter market?"  It almost makes me sick.  The issues that this presents is huge, and completely sad to me.  The fact that they will not allow our girls to be girls, but forces them to be concerned about image long before they are prepared to deal with the issues it presents, is truly maddening.

And, I would agree, it starts at home.  Most parents indulge the fantasy way more than I am comfortable.  I've seen it, and I know from personal experience, it is difficult to say no, to the young girl who spots pink sparkling heels her size.

What to do, but to continue to talk about it, and write about it!

Check out the mom blog for more info on this article.

Flat Iron Allure

I've been at war with what I do for a long time.  The beauty industry can seem so shallow, and full of itself, everybody taking themselves much to seriously.  At times, it can feel as though I am participating in the this large web of nonsense, which can make most women feel like they are on the outside.  And yet, for 27 years I've been standing behind the chair, helping women feel good about the way they look, is a very powerful act.  Because some of these women don't get approval, or made to feel beautiful at home, or at their work, it's vital to their self-esteem that they get it somewhere.  And if I haven't achieved this one thing for my client, than I have failed at my job. I had a client come in the other day, who I've seen for a couple of years.  She's made a couple of changes with her style, usually encouraged by her.  And when she does, she is firm about it.  The last style change, she brought in a picture of herself, long ago.  Her hair just sat in a long, bowl shaped, heavy look, almost looking like a wig.  "Outdated."  I thought to myself.  But I went with it, knowing I'd be able to update the look by letting her know it would look that much better if we made some adjustments. The idea of growing her hair frizzy, curly, hair out was unappealing.  But we began a six month process of growing it out.  We have achieved what she was going for, a feeling of more femininity.  We continue to talk about cutting off the medium brown, colored hair and letting her white hair show.  The color is pretty, I just wonder about the texture and being white.  I would like to see it.

The other day, I decided to flat iron her hair.  She has so wanted straight hair, and yet, she has only chemically straightened her hair once.  I'm relieved, perfectly smooth hair has always been difficult for me to accept.  Well, you would have thought I had made her world perfect.  She loved it!  Ohhing and ahhing out the door.

Then the calls started.  One the next morning, one that afternoon. She could only speak to me.  I called her back and got her machine, after a couple of rounds of calls, we spoke.  "Rebecca, I love my hair."  I laughed, and said, 'Great!'  "No, you have to understand.  I feel pretty.  I have never felt this way about the way I look."  Her husband dropped his jaw.  Men are looking at her.  The calls continued about setting up appointments to flat iron her hair, and then having to change them.

She feels conflicted about this, and I do to.  Her hair needs to be cut, if she is going to be wearing it straight.  Will she do it?  And, she feels at some level, she is fighting her hair. And, now with all the phone calls, it's a lot to manage if I have to be the one to make and move her appointments.  Regardless, the fact that she feels pretty, makes it all worth it. 

The Insipid Pair of Jeans

Nobody dresses anymore, men or women.  Jeans is all I see, and I find them utterly boring!  I find it very sad.  Everybody looks the same. I do love fashion in and of itself.  The eccentricity, the fabric, the design, the minds that think up new twist on old themes, all delight me.  Even if it is something I don't like, I can appreciate the idea, the concept, the color, or the fabric.  It's pure fantasy!  I appreciate beauty, I always have, and I always will.  When I go to work, with thought to what I am wearing, I feel I adds something to my environment.  It makes me feel connected to my own creativity, to myself, more grounded somehow.  It makes me feel as though I am participating with the life, and the world around me.

I'm not trendy by any means, and I certainly don't buy what other's say is in fashion.  I will look at magazines for inspiration though.  What is happening in fashion does dictate what is going on with hair, they are connected.  And I feel it is my job to inspire my clientele with these images, to inspire them to change, to grow.  And if  I am wearing jeans, I just don't see how it can happen.  Jeans are not me.

I'm not talking about people being uncomfortable, I'm not talking about people buying, buying, and buying.  I'm talking about caring, and tending to their own inner life, to their own joy, to the place that inspires them, and dressing from that place.  Jeans feel to easy.  And, are they a cop out?  Are people just to afraid to look different from anybody else?

Have people become apathetic?  The world is filled with violence, and hatred.  Beauty, love, and speaking up to injustice is the anecdote.  And it starts with ourselves.